Thursday, April 30, 2009


I've got the most killer hiccups-maybe had too much wine. I'm only half way through my second glass. It's delicious, something I haven't tried. It's white Merlot and very light and fruity.

M came over tonight and watch a movie with me, rubbed my feet, and assured me he understood my mentality. (I had a talk with him about how I felt at a time that I should just break up with him, spare him, isolate myself, just to loose the added weight that's been driving me nuts). He supports me in the loosing weight area, since he knows I've been eating just to look normal in front of him, even when I wasn't the least bit hungry-which triggered me hugely. It's complicated with a mix of anorexia, bulimia, orthorexia, and binge eating. Majorly confused doesn't even cover it when I'm in the midst of a meltdown, or slip, or I should say situation when food and my body have turned into the 'issue' when it's really something else.

Honesty is the best policy.

1 comment:

  1. Honesty with wisdom is even more dangerous. And you sound like you are exercising both. A brilliant wayto suffocate the lies of the ed.